[AT] Paraprosdokian Sentences ...OT

[Herbert Metz]

H.L.
You have posted a very good listing; definitely a list worth saving.
Thanks for sharing.
Herb

> [Original Message]
> From: H. L. Staples <hlstaples at mcloudteleco.com>
> To: Antique tractor email discussion group<at at lists.antique-tractor.com>
<at at lists.antique-tractor.com>
> Date: 9/25/2010 6:44:57 PM
> Subject: [AT] Paraprosdokian Sentences ...OT
>
>  
>  
> it's good.
>  
>
>
>
>
>   
>
>    Paraprosdokian sentences:
>
> A  paraprosdokian is a figure of speech in which the latter part of  a
> sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected in a way that  causes the
> reader or listener to re-frame or reinterpret the  first part. It is
> frequently used for humorous or dramatic  effect.
>
> I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work  that way. So I stole
a
> bike and asked for forgiveness.
>
> Do not  argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat
you
>  with experience.
>
> I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my  grandfather. Not screaming
> and yelling like the passengers in his  car.
>
> The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on  the list.
>
> If I agreed with you, we'd both be  wrong.
>
> We never really grow up; we only learn how to act in  public.
>
> War does not determine who is right -- only who is  left.
>
> Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not  putting it in a
> fruit salad.
>
> The early bird might get the worm,  but the second mouse gets the cheese.
>
> Evening news is where  they begin with 'Good evening,' and then proceed to
> tell you why it  isn't.
>
> To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal  from many is
> research.
>
> A bus station is where a bus stops. A  train station is where a train
stops.
> My desk is a work  station.
>
> How is it one careless match can start a forest fire,  but it takes a
whole
> box to start a campfire?
>
> Dolphins are so  smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they
> can train people  to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them
fish.
>
> I  thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted paychecks.
>
> A  bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you 
don't
> need it.
>
> Whenever I fill out an application, in the part  that says "In an
> emergency, notify:"  I put " A  DOCTOR."
>
> I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming  you.
>
> Why does someone believe you when you say there are four  billion stars,
but
> check when you say the paint is wet?
>
> Behind  every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a
> successful  man is usually another woman.
>
> A clear conscience is usually the  sign of a bad memory.
>
> You do not need a parachute to skydive.  You only need a parachute to
> skydive twice.
>
> The voices in my  head may not be real, but they have some
>  good  ideas!
>
> I discovered I scream the same way whether I'm about to  be devoured by a
> great white shark or if a piece of seaweed touches my  foot.
>
> Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others, whenever  they go.
>
> There's a fine line between cuddling and holding  someone down so they
can't
> get away.
>
> I used to be indecisive.  Now I'm not sure.
>
> I always take life with a grain of salt...  plus a slice of lemon... and a
> shot of tequila.
>
> You're never  too old to learn something stupid.
>
> To be sure of hitting the  target, shoot first and call whatever you hit
the
>  target.
>
> Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
>
> A bus is a  vehicle that runs twice as fast when you are after it as when
> you are  in it.
>
> Change is inevitable, except from a  vending
> machine.
>
>
>
> =
>  
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